A few weeks ago I received an email from a close friend directing me to a site where I could enter a contest to win a spot at Lilith, a music festival for female artists. My first reaction was, “Lilith is still going on?” My second: “Argh! Another contest. Gross. I guess I should enter.” (Read on …)
I’m sitting by my bedroom window watching the rain (when I should be sleeping) and feeling the weighty presence of the last letter I received from my grandmother. With the holidays rapidly approaching, I am dreading what I won’t receive this year. (Read on …)
Sometimes it’s hard to keep doing music when I feel constantly bombarded with advice/criticism/ideas. Here are some examples of actual things I have heard in the last year:
Gayle! You need to do more shows!
You’re playing too many shows. Focus on just a few!
Go on the road! What are you doing in San Diego?
You need to play less shows and make the shows you do play better and bigger!
Gayle! You aren’t doing enough shows on your tours!
You need to slow down– you’re doing too much.
What is it you’re missing? Maybe you’re focusing on the wrong things.
Why aren’t you famous yet?
If you get a “real” job, you’ll never make it because you won’t be as hungry for it.
Get a REAL job! You’ll be able to support your music!
My friend just went on the road for a year and now she has a major deal!
You need to stay in San Diego and build up your following here before you go anywhere else!
You need to get out there more and network!
You network more than anyone I know. Maybe you’re in the wrong circles-?
You need a more consistent band!
Screw the band- you’re fine by yourself!
You need to promote your songs that are more “pop.”
You need to promote your songs that are totally different from what everyone else is doing.
You need to be more mainstream!
You need to show your more artistic side!
You need to build momentum!
People think you already have momentum and don’t need help. Maybe you should be more vulnerable…
Well, here I am being vulnerable! Let’s try that.
Basically, until you “make it” in this industry you are fair game for anyone who ever thought they understood what it means to be a successful musician. It’s all well-meaning, but when it all adds up it’s like people are trying to bury you. I think I realized I don’t need advice… I need actual help. Like a manager… or a booker, an investor, an agent, a publicist who doesnt’ rip me off, a better licensing deal, etc, etc. So, if you can help with one of these things, I promise I work harder than 99% of the musicians you’ve met or will meet. If you can’t help with one of these things, I don’t want to hear what you have to say. It’s not that I don’t love you. It’s not that I don’t appreciate you. I just need a break!
One of the most intriguing things in the world is how people interpret things differently from one another. Oh, ambiguity! (Read on …)